your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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