would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
