AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
