How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
