Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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