Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
