don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
