She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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