Your mouth is God's brothel.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
