Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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