Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
