I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
It's shark week go big or go home
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
