You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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