Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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