quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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