I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
