I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
you inspire me to be a worse person
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
