I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
