To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
