I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
YAS. BRING CRAB.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
