I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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