I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
