Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
wow bdsm is so cute
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
