okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
