Quick, to the slutcave!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
