I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
