real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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