So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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