I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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