Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
