belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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