This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
