do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
