I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
tell me about the eggs
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
