Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
