i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
