What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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