john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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