I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
