i just wanna soil my oats bro
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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