If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
