awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
