It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Say something about gay babies.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
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