hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
