Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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