If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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