we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
