Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
