It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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