Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
